![]() ![]() Satisfaction is what this video is about, I’m going to try to explain every way I find Tetris to be gratifying, and through its falling blocks, show how games generate satisfying experiences.įirst, lets define satisfaction. Though, to be honest, I’m a little ambivalent to Tetris’s perfection, because the word “perfect” does not describe how I feel when I play Tetris, the joyful satisfaction that comes through its dynamic and interesting play. It has an easy to understand premise and its interlocking pieces all work together to create its fantastic experience, remove any piece and the tower falls apart. ![]() One such voice is MatthewMatosis (), who argues Tetris is a perfect game because it is both simple and irreducible. See? I told you I wasn’t crazy.Tetris, perhaps more than another other game, is described as “perfect” by video game critics. I believe the T-block is the sexiest tetrimino, and I’m not alone on this: just look at the front cover of this Tetris-themed smut story on Amazon. The T-block is also purple, the color of royalty. The T-block excels at plugging any orifice you need to deal with. But no, the T-block also gets its own, famous technique called the T-spin where true gamers commit advanced wizardry to spirit a T-block into a T shaped hole. T is for Tetris, and honestly that should be enough to rank S- tier. Visually, this straight, symmetrical block invokes a slender, graceful elegance akin to Kate Moss when it struts into the playing field.The I-block is long, strong, and dare I say… phallic? S Tier – T-block As seen on Oprah! The only flaws of the I-block are that it can’t fix up a messy structure and it can blueball you if you get one before your big combo is ready. Dropping this bad boy into your carefully planned stack feels like losing your virginity to your high school love under the starry night sky just outside Albuquerque. I don’t need to explain why the I-block is so valuable. A Tier – I-block Hahahaha, I’m losing it! If you look at these blocks and think “damn, those are some sexy pixels,” then YOU’RE the crazy one, not me. The feminine P can be seen as some bahama mama bodonkadonks or an absolute dumpy depending on its rotation, while the masculine L looks like a stud with a big schlong. They may not be symmetrical, but that’s ugly hot in a Timothée Chalamet sort of way. They come with a convenient one-block offshoot to plug any lone gaps you may have, while the longer side can serve as a makeshift I- piece when you need to clear a couple rows. The L- and P-blocks are workhorses of the Tetris world. B tier – L-block, P-block He can fill my gap… Tetris gamers might place these below the S/Z blocks for gameplay reasons, but I believe the overwhelming symmetry of the square shape places it a step above. Unfortunately it is not, and you will rarely have a clean two-wide gap to dump this bad boy in. It has great symmetry, and would easily clean the board if it was the only block in the game. It marches to the beat of its own drum, never changing shape no matter how hard you mash the rotate button. The Square block, or O-block, represents simple life. C tier – Square Woah… It like really makes you think, man…. I am placing the S below the Z shape for being a disgusting shade of puke green. I think it’s telling that the most common use for these blocks is to fix its own gaps. Even when you have a one-deep gap to plug these abominations in, the rest of the block will sloppily hang out to ruin your vibe. It’s very telling that these blocks are the only ones that will immediately set you up for failure on a blank screen. The S- and Z-blocks are explicitly designed to stick out of your carefully crafted structures like a dickhead. D tier – S-block, Z-block I don’t know why this Tetris block is a waifu but I hate her, too So replace that comment correcting us with a comment saying “damn, you guys really know your stuff” since we need the engagement, and move along. We will be considering each block’s aesthetics and utility as we evaluate an objectively correct ranking.īy the way, we know the blocks are called Tetriminos, jackass. Not all shapes made from four interconnected blocks are created equal, and we aim to find out which Tetris blocks stand above the rest. We live in a capitalist society where blocks are defined by their economic value, and nobody is free from being arbitrarily scaled on a tier list. You may be asking yourself, “what’s the point of ranking the Tetris blocks?” I’ll tell you why – because life is unfair. I remember when I was a young boy in Soviet Russia playing Tetris with sticks and rocks, and my once-friend Vladimir Valenekovski fought me to the death over which 4-square creation should be placed in S-tier. That’s right, we finally settled the decades-long debate over where Tetris blocks would be placed on a letter-based tier list. ![]()
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